{"id":26723,"date":"2017-08-09T22:03:54","date_gmt":"2017-08-09T22:03:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/e-motivasyon.net\/?p=26723"},"modified":"2026-03-24T20:47:57","modified_gmt":"2026-03-24T20:47:57","slug":"ask-kurallari-olmayan-bir-oyundur-kazanan-her-seyi-alir-david-baird","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/e-motivasyon.net\/en\/ask-kurallari-olmayan-bir-oyundur-kazanan-her-seyi-alir-david-baird.html","title":{"rendered":"“A\u015fk, kurallar\u0131 olmayan bir oyundur; kazanan her \u015feyi al\u0131r.” David Baird"},"content":{"rendered":"

“A\u015fk, kurallar\u0131 olmayan bir oyundur; kazanan her \u015feyi al\u0131r.” David Baird<\/em><\/h3>\n

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\u201cA\u015fk, kurallar\u0131 olmayan bir oyundur; kazanan her \u015feyi al\u0131r.\u201d s\u00f6z\u00fcyle David Baird<\/span><\/span>, a\u015fk\u0131n mant\u0131kla s\u0131n\u0131rland\u0131r\u0131lamayan do\u011fas\u0131na dikkat \u00e7eker. G\u00fcnl\u00fck ya\u015famda \u00e7o\u011fu ili\u015fkiyi kurallar, beklentiler ve g\u00f6r\u00fcnmez s\u00f6zle\u015fmeler \u00fczerinden anlamaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131r\u0131z. Kim daha \u00e7ok arad\u0131, kim daha fazla fedak\u00e2rl\u0131k yapt\u0131, kim hakl\u0131 \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131\u2026 Oysa a\u015fk, hesap cetveliyle \u00f6l\u00e7\u00fclebilecek bir deneyim de\u011fildir. Bu s\u00f6z bize \u015funu hat\u0131rlat\u0131r: A\u015fk\u0131n ger\u00e7ek g\u00fcc\u00fc, kontrol etmeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131zda de\u011fil, kendimizi samimiyetle ortaya koydu\u011fumuzda ortaya \u00e7\u0131kar.<\/strong> \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc a\u015fk bir rekabet de\u011fil, bir teslimiyet h\u00e2lidir. Kurallar\u0131n olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131 yerde strateji de\u011fil, i\u00e7tenlik belirleyici olur; kazanan ise kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131ndakini de\u011fil, kendi kalbini a\u00e7abilen ki\u015fidir.<\/p>\n

Bu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnceden ilhamla g\u00fcnl\u00fck ya\u015famda uygulayabilece\u011fimiz tek ama etkili bir pratik \u00f6neri \u015fudur: \u201cHakl\u0131 Olmak Yerine Anlamak\u201d al\u0131\u015fkanl\u0131\u011f\u0131.<\/strong> Bir tart\u0131\u015fma s\u0131ras\u0131nda kendinize \u015fu soruyu sorun: \u201c\u015eu anda kazanmak m\u0131 istiyorum, yoksa ili\u015fkimi g\u00fc\u00e7lendirmek mi?\u201d<\/em> \u00c7o\u011fu zaman ili\u015fkilerimizi yoran \u015fey sorunlar\u0131n kendisi de\u011fil, hakl\u0131 \u00e7\u0131kma ihtiyac\u0131m\u0131zd\u0131r. Bir ad\u0131m geri \u00e7ekilip kar\u015f\u0131m\u0131zdaki ki\u015finin duygusunu anlamaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131zda, ileti\u015fim aniden yumu\u015far. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc insanlar mant\u0131ksal olarak de\u011fil, duygusal olarak anla\u015f\u0131lmak ister. A\u015fkta ger\u00e7ek kazan\u00e7, tart\u0131\u015fmay\u0131 kazanmak de\u011fil, ba\u011f\u0131 kaybetmemektir.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Bunu g\u00fcnl\u00fck hayattan basit bir \u00f6rnekle d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnelim: Yo\u011fun bir g\u00fcn\u00fcn ard\u0131ndan eve gelen iki insan aras\u0131nda k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir yanl\u0131\u015f anla\u015f\u0131lma ya\u015fan\u0131r. Bir taraf savunmaya ge\u00e7er, di\u011feri ele\u015ftiriye\u2026 Tart\u0131\u015fma b\u00fcy\u00fcyebilir. Ancak taraflardan biri durup \u201cBug\u00fcn zor bir g\u00fcn ge\u00e7irmi\u015f olmal\u0131s\u0131n\u201d dedi\u011finde ortam de\u011fi\u015fir. Ayn\u0131 olay, farkl\u0131 bir yakla\u015f\u0131m sayesinde bir \u00e7at\u0131\u015fmadan yak\u0131nla\u015fma an\u0131na d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr. \u0130\u015fte David Baird\u2019in s\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fcn \u00f6z\u00fc burada sakl\u0131d\u0131r: a\u015fk, kurallarla y\u00f6netilen bir oyun de\u011fil, cesaretle ya\u015fanan bir deneyimdir. A\u015fkta ger\u00e7ekten kazanan ki\u015fi, kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131ndakini yenmeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015fan de\u011fil; kalbini korumak yerine payla\u015fmay\u0131 se\u00e7endir.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

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David Baird Kimdir?<\/strong><\/h3>\n

David Baird (1956\u2013 ) \u0130ngiliz yazar ve d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcrd\u00fcr. \u00d6zellikle a\u015fk, ili\u015fkiler, felsefe ve insan do\u011fas\u0131 \u00fczerine kaleme ald\u0131\u011f\u0131 eserlerle tan\u0131n\u0131r. Pop\u00fcler felsefe alan\u0131nda yazd\u0131\u011f\u0131 kitaplarda karma\u015f\u0131k duygusal ve varolu\u015fsal konular\u0131 sade bir anlat\u0131mla ele alm\u0131\u015f, ili\u015fkilerde fark\u0131ndal\u0131k ve i\u00e7sel anlay\u0131\u015f temalar\u0131n\u0131 \u00f6ne \u00e7\u0131karm\u0131\u015ft\u0131r. A\u015fk ve insan ili\u015fkilerine dair s\u00f6zleri, duygular\u0131n mant\u0131ksal kurallarla s\u0131n\u0131rlanamayaca\u011f\u0131n\u0131 vurgulayan yakla\u015f\u0131m\u0131yla geni\u015f bir okur kitlesine ula\u015fm\u0131\u015ft\u0131r.<\/p>\n

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A\u015fk ve Sevgi \u00dczerine En \u0130yi \u00d6zl\u00fc S\u00f6zler<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n