{"id":19368,"date":"2016-01-30T11:20:24","date_gmt":"2016-01-30T09:20:24","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.ozdeyis.net\/?p=16836"},"modified":"2026-10-06T14:57:48","modified_gmt":"2026-10-06T14:57:48","slug":"affetmekten-daha-tanrisal-bir-sey-olamaz-doris-lessing","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/e-motivasyon.net\/en\/affetmekten-daha-tanrisal-bir-sey-olamaz-doris-lessing.html","title":{"rendered":"\u201cThere is nothing more divine than forgiveness.\u201d Doris Lessing"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u201cThere is nothing more divine than forgiveness.\u201d Doris Lessing<\/strong><\/em><\/h3>\n

\"Tibet'te<\/a><\/p>\n

Affetmek, yap\u0131lan\u0131 do\u011fru bulmak ya da ya\u015fananlar\u0131 hi\u00e7 olmam\u0131\u015f gibi kabul etmek de\u011fildir. Affetmek, ya\u015fanan ac\u0131n\u0131n hayat\u0131m\u0131z \u00fczerindeki h\u00fckm\u00fcn\u00fc sona erdirmektir.<\/strong> Doris Lessing\u2019in bu s\u00f6z\u00fc, insan\u0131n kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131ndaki ki\u015fiyi cezaland\u0131rmak yerine kendi i\u00e7indeki \u00f6fke, k\u0131rg\u0131nl\u0131k ve intikam duygusundan \u00f6zg\u00fcrle\u015fmesini anlat\u0131r. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc baz\u0131 yaralar, olay sona erdikten \u00e7ok sonra bile zihnimizde ya\u015famaya devam eder. Affetmek ise ge\u00e7mi\u015fi de\u011fi\u015ftirmez; fakat ge\u00e7mi\u015fle kurdu\u011fumuz ili\u015fkiyi de\u011fi\u015ftirebilir. Bu nedenle affetmek, yaln\u0131zca kar\u015f\u0131m\u0131zdaki insana sundu\u011fumuz bir iyilik de\u011fil, kendi ruhumuza a\u00e7t\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z bir \u00f6zg\u00fcrl\u00fck alan\u0131d\u0131r.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Bu s\u00f6zden g\u00fcnl\u00fck hayat\u0131m\u0131za ta\u015f\u0131yabilece\u011fimiz tek bir pratik \u00f6neri var: Affetmekte zorland\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131z bir ki\u015fi i\u00e7in, onun davran\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131 de\u011fil, o davran\u0131\u015f\u0131n sizde b\u0131rakt\u0131\u011f\u0131 y\u00fck\u00fc d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcn ve kendinize \u201cBunu daha ne kadar ta\u015f\u0131mak istiyorum?\u201d diye sorun.<\/strong> Bu soru, ya\u015fananlar\u0131 k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fcmsemek veya s\u0131n\u0131rlar\u0131m\u0131zdan vazge\u00e7mek anlam\u0131na gelmez. Gerekiyorsa bir insan\u0131 hayat\u0131m\u0131zdan uzak tutabilir, g\u00fcvenimizi yeniden vermeyebiliriz. Fakat b\u00fct\u00fcn bunlar\u0131 yaparken i\u00e7imizde s\u00fcrekli b\u00fcy\u00fcyen \u00f6fkeyi ta\u015f\u0131mak zorunda de\u011filiz. Affetmek bazen birine yeniden kap\u0131 a\u00e7mak de\u011fil, kendi i\u00e7imizde kapanmayan bir kap\u0131y\u0131 kapatabilmektir.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00d6rne\u011fin y\u0131llar \u00f6nce bir arkada\u015f\u0131n\u0131z\u0131n size haks\u0131zl\u0131k etti\u011fini ve aran\u0131zdaki ili\u015fkinin bitti\u011fini d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcn. O ki\u015fi art\u0131k hayat\u0131n\u0131zda olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131 h\u00e2lde, onu her hat\u0131rlad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131zda ayn\u0131 \u00f6fkeyi yeniden ya\u015fayabilirsiniz. Oysa bir g\u00fcn, \u201cYapt\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 onaylam\u0131yorum ama art\u0131k bunun hayat\u0131m\u0131 y\u00f6netmesine izin vermiyorum\u201d diyebilirsiniz. Belki ili\u015fkiniz yeniden ba\u015flamaz, belki o ki\u015fiyi bir daha hi\u00e7 g\u00f6rmezsiniz; fakat i\u00e7inizdeki hesap kapanmaya ba\u015flad\u0131\u011f\u0131nda ge\u00e7mi\u015fin \u00fczerinizdeki a\u011f\u0131rl\u0131\u011f\u0131 da azal\u0131r. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc ger\u00e7ek affetme, ge\u00e7mi\u015fte ya\u015fananlar\u0131 silmek de\u011fil, ge\u00e7mi\u015fin bug\u00fcn\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fc y\u00f6netme hakk\u0131n\u0131 elinden almakt\u0131r.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

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Doris Lessing Kimdir?<\/h3>\n

Doris Lessing (1919-2013), \u0130ran do\u011fumlu \u0130ngiliz romanc\u0131, \u015fair ve deneme yazar\u0131d\u0131r. 20. y\u00fczy\u0131l\u0131n \u00f6nemli edebiyat\u00e7\u0131lar\u0131ndan biri kabul edilen Lessing, eserlerinde insan ili\u015fkileri, kad\u0131nlar\u0131n ya\u015fam\u0131, toplumsal adalet, \u00f6zg\u00fcrl\u00fck, siyaset ve bireyin i\u00e7 d\u00fcnyas\u0131 gibi konular\u0131 ele ald\u0131. En tan\u0131nm\u0131\u015f eserlerinden The Golden Notebook<\/em> (Alt\u0131n Defter), modern edebiyat\u0131n \u00f6nemli romanlar\u0131 aras\u0131nda yer al\u0131r. Edebiyat kariyeri boyunca \u00e7ok say\u0131da \u00f6d\u00fcl alan Lessing, 2007 y\u0131l\u0131nda Nobel Edebiyat \u00d6d\u00fcl\u00fc\u2019ne lay\u0131k g\u00f6r\u00fcld\u00fc ve g\u00fc\u00e7l\u00fc, ba\u011f\u0131ms\u0131z anlat\u0131m\u0131yla \u00e7a\u011fda\u015f edebiyat \u00fczerinde kal\u0131c\u0131 bir etki b\u0131rakt\u0131.<\/p>\n

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Personal Development Quotations<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n